How has been 2022 for you?
Have you been pursuing your dreams?
Have you improved in one way or another?
This article is here to help me being clear about what I’ve learned while coaching aspiring tennis pro players, and hopefully give you some inspiration for you, too. .
Because the more each of us does what’s true for our hearts, the better this planet becomes.
So, here we are with Ronan, Oliver, Arthur and Gatien’s lessons.
Ronan: being true to yourself
“I don’t know why I coach him. I like him quite a bit and at the same time I’m still not sure. I doubt he actually wants to be a professional. And somehow it feels important that I do it. It feels like I’m supposed to do it.”
These are the kind of words I was telling my wife when she asked me about Ronan. Indeed, usually I only coach those who have big dreams (being a top tennis player), and there was a question of walking the talk with Ronan that was, hmm, questionable.
Nevertheless, I wanted to help as much as I could.
And so in January 2022, I did a last trip with Ronan in UK, for training and competitions.
Smart, sensitive, talkative, passionate about cooking, Ronan had cultivated the dream of being a tennis pro since he was a kid. And while I saw his potential with the way he can hit the ball from times to times, it was also obvious there were also some voices, some “demons”, something, that was bothering him.
In training, all good, he was doing his best, improving in many ways.
It’s in competition the troubles came.
I often say that, to me, tennis competition is like alcohol, soon or later it reveals who you really are.
You cannot lie for too long. Truth comes up.
And though I’m not a CIA operator willing to extract top secrets, I was willing to understand, and help Ronan being clear with himself.
Because, as my friend Marion used to tell me: “Clarity is power.”
“Why are you becoming so upset when things don’t turn the way you wish?”
“It seems to me that you lose your motivation when you start to lose matches, or just after a few matches played.”
“What do you actually want, Ronan?”
Asking these questions.
Allowing silence to do the work.
Being genuinely curious and caring.
Until something from deep inside pops up.
Finally, Ronan came to realize that it was more important for him to study at university, placing tennis second, rather than continuing to pretend to himself that he wanted to be a pro.
Big shift in consciousness, that required lots of courage and honesty with himself.
One year later, I see Ronan being a happier, stronger, and more resilient human being.
And most important: aligned with himself.
Well done man. Now you “just” need to rince and repeat the process.
You’re on your way to live the life you truly desire deep within. True to yourself.
Happy to be your friend!
Lessons from coaching Ronan:
- caring for the person, first and foremost.
- asking challenging questions, being genuinely curious and wait for the answers to come up.
- in the end, being aligned with yourself.
Oliver: clear with your real victory
Gatien (see below), explained to me that someone told him that there are 2 kinds of great tennis players: the warriors and the soldiers.
While the formers will battle and conquer new territories no matter what or how, it’s in their natures to fight (hello Arthur, hello Gatien, hello myself!), the soldiers excel when someone guide them very clearly.
Having coached a few of these types in the past, when Esther, Oliver’s mother, asked me whether I was available to start coaching Oliver in tournaments, I agreed while being skeptical: let’s see if it fits well between this particular soldier and me…
Oliver is from 2007 (he will be 16 in 2023). When lockdown happened, I talked to him a couple of times and even gave him a fitness plan with kettlebells. When I did ask him what he thought was his strengths in tennis, he told me: “I’m good at doing what I’m told to do.” Which is the perfect definition of the committed soldier!
And so we met, Oliver, Esther and me, in South Africa in February 2022 for playing a couple of ITF juniors tournaments. One of my favorite countries in the world to do one of the things I enjoy the most in life, peak performance coaching, thank you!
At that time, Oliver was ranked 1700 ITF juniors, struggling to win matches. Having grown very fast and very tall, I wouldn’t say he was a model of agility.
Most concerning, when I asked him to attempt to do a squat (not with weight on his shoulders, just an air squat), he could only go down a few centimeters, far from being able to be parallel to the floor. Houston, we got a problem!
One year later, Jan 2023, I’m with him again, in Costa Rica, and he’s now ranked 115 ITF. What!?!
We went to Oslo (winning the tournament), Istanbul (semi-final), and South Africa again in November (won both tournaments).
When I think of the reasons we’ve had such a successful relationship, a few ideas come to mind:
- first, we’ve had lots of fun, on and off the court.
I believe the most important in whatever dream we choose to follow is the journey: it’s great to be passionate, even obsessed with our improvements, dreams and goals. And it’s essential to have at the same time a mindset where we remove expectations. Not an easy task, and worth keeping in mind.
I’m glad to say my biggest laughter for the last 10 years has been playing poker together with Oliver, Esther and another coach. A story worth telling, maybe another time!
- second, your real victory.
I have a principle: we are strong when we are aligned with ourselves, our personality and who we naturally are (see example with Ronan above).
I therefore asked Oliver questions like:
– “where do you see yourself becoming extraordinary?”
– “What will be your strengths?”
– “What do you enjoy to do?”
He told me that he likes to serve, and come to the net. Oh, and also big forehands!
Sounds like a plan to me! And this, in a nutshell, is what I call a real victory, something we can focus on that makes us special.
This is where we mostly focused our attention, and how he became excellent enjoying playing with his strengths.
- third, because he’s such a good soldier, it required me to remain steady, calm and clear in all circumstances. This attitude, this energy, I believe has helped him to remain confident, knowing there is someone outside his family that he can count on. It probably has helped him in Istanbul when the opponent and his mother were, to say the least, quite provocative!
- last and not the least, the power of the team. Jez has helped him transform his body and now he’s much more in control of his movements. Esther manages the organization. Lars thinks strategically. And Dan, and Miles, and another Lars, have been here as well. Though it’s a lot of people, somehow it has worked. Alright then!
To Oliver if you read this: remember the goal is to become “dangerous” with your game, any time!
Lessons from coaching Oliver:
- having fun
- your real victory
- calm and steady
- team work
Arthur: tell me what you see, I take care of the rest!
Arthur is the person, besides my wife, that I’ve spent the most time with in the last 5 years. At 15, he was an average regional tennis player. At 20, and just playing on the Tour half a year (the other part of the year he was in Stanford), he’s 400 ATP with a huge potential to develop.
Arthur and I are similar in many ways. Rebels (see the 4 tendencies). Neurotypes 1C. “Air” guys in the motorprefrences (see Action Types). And with “king” attributes.
One of the consequences is that we don’t enjoy being told what or how to do something. At least if we haven’t asked for it.
Said differently, if you attempt to coach Arthur the way you do with Oliver, you’re in trouble!
- Feedbacks:
This personality trait has lead Arthur to tell me last summer: “what I like the most with you is the quality of your feedbacks.”
Cool.
I didn’t realize.
So, I’ve been helping him getting clear in what he does and where he can improve.
Then, Arthur’s style, he figures out how to do it.
For instance, I told him I could see him returning serves with more impact, like Agassi. Then in Canada he found out the way to do it: “I dive into each return!”
And the vision, once again, became reality.
2. Chaos training:
Since Arthur doesn’t like to be told how to do things, once we get clear of what we’re looking for, my job is to create challenging situations where he has to find out solutions.
This was done for instance with defense situations, using the pointer. Or closing one eye in return of serve.
3. Footwork:
Even though I created a footwork tennis course and I thought I was pretty much done with this topic (crazy me), we had to get better, so with the help of Gareth we asked ourselves:
- how can we increase the speed of the first step to go to the ball?
- how do we position the body so that naturally we’re good in defense situations?
- how to improve the inside out forehand?
- how can we be more stable, in the split step and to avoid being wrong stepped?
We worked a lot on these, and it paid off. Tennis is, after all, more a game of feet than hands!
3. Personal support:
Arthur’s personal life in 2022 has not been easy.
Sometimes I felt that it was helping him to mature faster and to take more responsibility for his life. Sometimes the accumulation of stress was too much to handle and being able to play tennis at his best.
And so we have grown together, through challenges and victories.
5. Resonance breathing:
This is the kind of breathing that Arthur feels has helped him the most, to be relaxed and ready.
At some point I will publish my breathing course, and it will definitely part of it.
Lessons learned with Arthur:
- feedbacks for clarity of the vision.
- chaos training to support the vision.
- importance of polishing footwork
- emotional support
- resonance breathing
Gatien: the antifragile path
I haven’t been able to be with Gatien as much as I wished in 2022. Nonetheless, I see him improving his tennis, and most important becoming a resilient, determined, and antifragile human being.
One inspiration in this regard comes from him mother, Cécile, who has chosen to go to swim in the Annecy lake every day…even during winter (see her blog here, and you can see the post with me on the 18th Dec).
In my most recent trip there, I went into the water with them. Stayed in it for 30 seconds (and paid the price for it).
Gatien went in, total immersion.
While Cécile swam for about 15 min.
The water was at less than 8 degrees celsius…
Lesson learned:
- cultivate your antifragility
2022, thank you
Once again I’ve learned a lot, while doing a job I love.
Gratitude to all of you guys.
Now, let’s rock 2023!
And to all the readers, happy to read your comments if you wish, whether it’s to share what you’ve learned in 2022 or what you get from this article.
Namaste.
Really insightful. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and the lessons you’ve learnt. I learnt a lot.
I’m glad it did help. Thanks for telling me. The goal is for all of us to keep improving, isn’t it?!